• The Missing Puzzle Piece

    Our Emotional intelligence is our ability to understand the emotions and thoughts of others in order to predict their behavior and react appropriately. Having high emotional intelligence makes you especially attractive to businesses bosses because you can work well as part of a team. Promoting this skill can benefit all your relationships – and maybe your employability prospects. Despite all this, there’s a missing puzzle piece that you need to succeed – confidence.

    What is confidence and how can we get it?


    Typically being smart also means you have higher emotional intelligence. There are exceptions to this trend. For example, imagine your stereotypical school geek, he probably looks like the guy below. This highly intelligent figure of your imagination is probably far from persuasive and verging on socially awkward. So what’s going on?

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    The answer may lie in an over-sensitivity to the emotions and thoughts of others. Second guessing what people say or do generates anxiety and knocks your confidence down in social situations. Their emotional intelligence has left them being able to see every possible interpretation of their behavior and they become shy and quiet as a result.

    On the other hand, your stereotypical ‘lad’ can be left oh so blissfully ignorant of how their actions can appear brash, aggressive or arrogant. They are left free to act with confidence – perhaps to the demise of their work and personal relationships. Maybe they could do with a counsellor to help increase their emotional intelligence.

    Developing Confidence

    It’s clear to see that emotional intelligence alone is not enough. A balance with confidence is needed. You need confidence in the abilities that you possess.

    As well as the ability to accept you will ultimately make many mistakes but your conviction to overcome them will help you grow. So how can you strengthen this self-acceptance?

    The answer lies in practicing making an idiot of yourself. Strange but useful. These embarrassing situations need you to be brave to brush them off. Try asking someone for their number, talking to a stranger and laughing it off when you fall over. Train yourself to not care so much about what others think. Over time you can learn to lose your self-consciousness and develop the confidence you want.

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    For some of us getting to this stage of powerful emotional intelligence and confidence may require a little support along the way. Luckily the experts at Birmingham Counselling Services are here to help you – get in touch at: https://birminghamcounsellingservices.co.uk/

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