Do you have self-confidence or would you like more? This is an issue that is raised by many people who get in touch with Birmingham Counselling Services. Your answer to the question might well be: No, I’m not very confident, but I would like to be. This is a very general response. It helps if you can be more specific, to set yourself a particular target to concentrate on.
If you are a student you might lack the courage to speak up and ask questions in class. A manager might dread having to present a report to the Board of Directors. You might have a brilliant idea and the opportunity to travel in an exciting new direction in your work, but it would mean leaving your secure paid employment and trusting yourself to become a freelance. You might want to get in touch with your child’s school to ask questions about their policies, their procedures, or your child’s treatment by a particular teacher. In any of these circumstances and in many more you might think of you need a certain level of confidence to start you off and carry you along the path.
Perhaps there is something particular coming up which you know will be a challenge, and you are doubting whether you will be able to meet it.
Test yourself. Look at the following questions, answering them with a simple Yes or No:
Everyone will answer yes to a few of these, but if you find you have more Yesses than Noes it could be that your lack of confidence is hampering your personal, professional and/or social life. And there are ways to tackle this, one of which is by asking yourself a few more questions:
Everyone will have negative responses to a few of these – if you have some positives that is a very good sign, and the more positives the better.
Remember that no response is ever final. We can improve how we feel about ourselves without becoming unrealistic or unattractively self-important and future articles will look at some of the possible ways to achieve greater self-esteem.
We hope that you have found this article helpful, and we would welcome feedback. If you feel that you need external support in getting to grips with this very sensitive issue please don’t hesitate to get in touch with the team at Birmingham Counselling Services, on 0121 314 9903. Alternatively you can send us a message through the contact page on this website, where you found the article: www.BirminghamCounsellingServices.co.uk